Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Go Freak Yu'self ... (listening to She's Not There)

Eses … everything can go wabby … si los dejes … a few weeks ago … before dysfunctional familia members made their X-MAS visits … SBC … the telecommunications cochinada … mailed me, and maybe all you pinche ustedes, CONECTATE … simon … a glossy 24 pager magazine en espanol glamorizing the firme mundo de technology including DSL, CABLE TV, CELL PHONES, ETCETERA … simon … it’s actually 48 pages when you count the flipsided English version … SBC has new pinche customer packages and they created a booklet IN COLOR ... full of caras café to show how happy WE can all be if we SBC’d out our firme casitas …

Simon … it seems SBC has new products that continue to label to the MAXX … mira ... the magazine advertises CONEXION MUDIAL … which allows unlimited local and long distance calling … simon … the same service you can get at the 7-11 telefono, the only pinche diference is, of course, with SBC, your’e in your warm casita sipping algo Mexicano ... and you don’t have to buy MILO pisto … ondale … tambien … this phone co has satellite TV deals for the LOVERS … simon … pues … if you’re rich … for X-MAS, you get the LOVER a Mercedes and a diamond ring … si lover no quiere el ring, lover can drive and return it … if you’re poor, the lover gets CHANKLAS and a CHROME VIBRATOR … simon … if lover hates the vibrator, pues lover can go FUCK ITSELF … BUTT LOVELY RAZA … we, apparently, want satellite TV … and it's no pinche ordinary satellite package …

CHECK IT OUT … DISH LATINO … is available for TV junkies … and SBC is the pusher vato … DISH LATINO includes 25 channels en espanol … and 6 Latino music channels … pinche YEAHHHH!!! … that’s for the poor vato, of course … the middle of the road vato can get DISH LATINO DOS …YIPPEEE!!!! … this cosa has the same as the first BUTT includes 150 channels en ingles … GRACIAS LOVER!!!! … anden … anden … hay DISH LATINO MAX for el pinche PLAYER … simon … you can walk around with your fucking 25 pound medalla hanging out of your wife-beater AND have what DOS has plus 45 more channels en ingles … PINCHE LOVER, VEN AQUI!!!! …

PERSONALLY and shit … I prefer the chanklas and vibrator for X-MAS … CHROME VIBRATOR, excuse me … with the CHANKLAS and toy … opportunities come … I can go out and get the papel and keep my big feet clean … I can swat imaginary moscas … I can write my name on the side with my new SHARPIE permanent pluma, my other barrio X-MAS regalo … then paint permanent black eyebrows above my brown ones … freaky! ... BUTT consider it over time!!! ... if the chanklas happen to be pink or burgundy with flowers, I can act like a HOTO IN sanTana HEAT when no one is watching … tu sabes … close the blinds … blast MADONNA … act like MEG from MARRIED CON PINCHE NINOS FEOS … or I can play HINA … lite un frajo at the mesa … remove my chankla and hit my imaginary vato, EL FLACO, in his imaginary scarred face and say "HAY TU FUCKING CABRONE" then throw myself INTO THE ROOM ... the opportunities are pinche endless with chanklas and a vibrator … chrome vibrator, excuse me …

BUTT LATINO DISH … DOS … MAX … AND BALLS … we ain’t escaping nada or doing no pinche MARKET BUILDING PARA NOSOTROS ... or nothing to produce y preserve our long-term economic interest … chale … it’s more labeling to the pinche MAX … simon … why LATINO … besides … what’s wrong with ordinary cable or satellite … and why 25 Mexican channels when we don’t even watch one … PURO BEDO … it’s another movida to build a second tier system for nosotros … divide our customer preference and forecast our consumer habits as though we're sister-kissing trading blocs …

DON’T get me wrong … tech is firme and good for you … I think … but to continue to build class differences in the name of consumer preference and choice in the name of TECHNOLOGY under our name … is … is … well, is not building anything good or worth nuestra fidea …

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