Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Te Veo at The Brando ... (listening to Infante)

Ondale ... Variety Magazine has a culo celebration of its 100th birthday ... simon ... on-pinche-line is a pinche special Centinnial Issue bitching about all the pinche Hollywood big shots that have developed nosotros y ustedes tambien into unos pinches MEDIA MARKET JUNKIES thru continuous local URBAN DEVELOPMENT ECONOMIA penetration that pinche dictates the design y pinche wise-guy planning of our beloved barrios and sacred vidas, down to the taste of our pinche daily taza de CHENATE-LATTE ... BUTT the pinche firme noticias es que there's un pinche sanTanian on that pinche CONQUERED HOLLYWOOD list ... pues ... yo ... El Sr. Barrio MARLON BRANDO ... simon ... not bad for a traveling man ...

SO ... es porque I toss y pinche turn when I see pinche articles in the OC Register about "Urban Transitions" ... transition ... that's an obscure word ... transition and microwave, never in the same pinche sentence ... transitions into que, gente ... the pinche loose gabacha Register puts out mas cochinada propaganda on Naranjaville's "changing urban core and how cities are reinventing themselves ... more communities are seeking an urban identity ..." Entonces this loose broad has the pinche odasity to request ideas from pretty y dark nippled nosotros to add to this pinche mocoso tale ... pinche gueys ....

MIRA MANUELA ET AL ... sanTana has a pinche decked out identity ... it's called NEW PINCHE ECONOMIA MARKETAS, THIS PINCHE WAY, GUEY ... simon ... and it's found in our pinche chile verde or colorado ... our tortillas con limon y sal ... in plato #2 de carne asada y un enchilada ... or is found when you add cabbage to your bowl of pinche posole ... or in our one buck paletas ... simon ... or you can be a quiet investor in our NEW PINCHE MARKETAS just by standing on the corner of Standard y McFadden in the dark AM when Ruben's torterilla is baking a-pinche-way ... simon ... OC OBSERVE as we sip our cafe y pan y wait for the pinche bus or AQMD-free related carpools ... or witness the coins and bills that we pump out during those hours to hustle la vida ... or in the herd of not-so-serious ninos who head off to a place once called escuelita ... BUTT as an investor, you must know that, like assholes, we have no pinche shareholder's meeting but we do have an ID and no new one is needed or welcome ... GRACIAS YOUUUU ....

AND if you still aren't convinced ... pues drive this pinche circle on a Measure EME 1/2 cent sales tax trail ... begin at the pinche DMV on Grand y 1st and head down 1st towards Main .... within 0.002 of a pinche mile you'll see what our intro to city life is like ... blood, sweat y pinche tears ... then you'll go down hill ... then come up hill ... then you'll hit El Metate y surrounding shops ... a very stinky place ... but that's us too ... from bread to heroine to bread ... that blocks a one stop shop ... continue on your journey ... you'll hit lots on your left and old but bustling commercial spaces on la pinche derecha ... keep going and enjoy the view and count the pinche monetry transactions ... legal, and not so pinche legal ...

THEN ... as you hit pinche MAIN STREET ... you can go straight and see another continous rite of passage into REAL modern urban life for us SPANISH SPEAKING MOTHER FUCKERS ... or you can gently turn left onto Calle Main and see the hidden jewels behind blighted walls ... or you can turn right, which I suggest, and see the our pinche SCREWDRIVER of Naranjaville downtown vida ... simon ... it's REAL commercialism using space efficiently as pinche chinga y nosotros creating inflation fighting barriers to ensure gente buy and pinche sell whatever .... we like it ... BUTT to think a MANHATTEN LIFESTYLE or downsizing or reduced economia de scales new vida will bring any unit of warranted progress by others remains unclear of what your asking ... pues check out the Farmer's Markets ... it's all pinche double creased with a menso pendelton in 100 degrees weather ... all burning down faster than you can say SPANISH SPEAKING MOTHER FUCKER ...

BUTT ... we know what you want ... transition our jewel SELF-DEVELOPED GROWING MARKETAS into TOO HIP GOTTA PINCHE GO COLONIAL HANGOUTS ... you want to tear down my beige TACO BELL plaster stucco guarranteed for life by Orozco and Sons and replace it with obscure satanic mocha wood siding or bad-luck olive green flat plaster, then remove my chipped white ceramic ducks made by a TECATE-campesino who lives in DELHI who also sold me a chinga nativity scene that lays in my one plant rose garden and St. Augustine crab grass that still itches me and replace them with black roaring LACMA patio furniture, which looks firme in pictures, with one small HIP light or stinky candle over my 5000 watt sensored outdoor light that robs sleep from my vecinos ... pues .. chale ... property values are falling ... so you can now afford to move back to SOUTH NARANJILLE ... BUTT you probably can't becuz ... housing inflation ... el pinche bubble ... affordability rate ... cost of pinche living ... consumer price index ... supply-side economias ... that's the SCREWDRIVER of your urban lifestyle en NOT SO CHEAP NOR PINCHE HIP MOJADOVILLE ...

BUTT ... more about me .. the BRANDO name continues to be DEVELOPED ... simon ... recently ... the LA Times Magazine ran a pinche piece on how my pinche isla ... 27-square-mile island called Tetiaroawill near Tahiti ... soon be turned into a pinche paradise resort ... to be name THE BRANDO ... sounds cool but not too pinche resort sounding ...

3 Comments:

At 1:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good!!!

 
At 8:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow great discriptions, i pictured myself driving down 1st. Do you know your turf or what!!!??

 
At 9:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Congrats cabrone, but aren't you a little rough on the general public?

 

Post a Comment

<< Home